Monday, April 02, 2007

how to overcome 'man-flu' the female way...

As you all know, I have not been particularly well this last week. But, because when I get a cold, I do not classify it as 'man flu', which seems to warrant spending at least 36 hours in bed, incapacitated, unable to do anything for oneself other than groan every now and then in the hope that someone will give some sympathy, I have continued life as normal.

Instead of spending time in bed, I went tobogganing with the kids from church, which I would highly recommend as an effective alternative remedy to all the males out there who think that bed-rest is the only way to rid yourself of a cold. Rather than keeping your cold-germs to yourself, you get to share them with everyone else, thus removing the selfish aspect of having a cold. Even better, follow my example and spend time with children, who are guaranteed to pass the cold around not only their own families, but all the children at school. So, not only are you not selfish with your cold, you are eliciting generosity.

I have just been on the phone, and my friend totally re-emphasised the ridiculousness of man-flu. Her fiancee has apparently suffered from a 'health breakdown', (female definition: common cold), which is the physical alternative to a mental breakdown, according to her fiancee. Absolutely hilarious. There were tears of laughter involved when she recounted to me the seriousness with which her husband to be had described his 'health breakdown.'

So the rest of my weekend continued as such...Saturday evening was spent planning an easter egg hunt for easter sunday morning, which will be spent at a static caravan park in Devon. My future housemates and I had great fun planning ways to make our friends look as ridiculous as possible, providing entertainment for everyone else at the caravan park. Upon returning home, rather than going to bed, I proceded to peel 40 odd potatoes and enough parsnips and carrots for 9 people for sunday lunch. Goodness knows where this stroke of genius came from - cooking a roast for 9 people when you have to be out of the house by 9am, and not knowing quite how many extra people might get invited at the end of church. Anyone would think I like a bit of a challenge.

Of course, the meal preparations could not go by without a near death experience. Well, maybe that's a slight exaggeration, but I did have vivid images before my eyes of the house burning down. I'd popped up to Helen's flat upstairs to check on the roast potatoes (not enough shelves in our oven for everything), and managed to tip the tray of roast potatoes and burning oil over the back of the oven shelf, plummeting them towards the flames. Fortunately it was all ok as the potatoes decided that they liked the safety of their roasting dish far too much to risk jumping completely into the flames. So nothing was burned, and the house still stands in one piece, but the potential for a fire was definitely there.

By the end of lunch, we were incredibly full, to the point of not being able to move from our seats for a good while. This might have had something to do with the rather extravagant desserts, consisting of chocolate souffles and lemon squares (hence the photo), of which, everyone had both, but managed to leave plenty to provide for our breakfast and lunch today.

So, to recapitulate, in order to overcome man-flu the female way, simply fill your time with tobogganing, egg hunt planning, parsnip peeling and potential fires, and top it all off with a good amount of sugary desserts, and you'll be cured.

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